Mutant Chronicles (2008, Director: Simon Hunter): Take Starship Troopers and strip out all that messy political satire. Combine with equal parts Alien and Fellowship of the Ring, then sprinkle with The Dirty Dozen. Reuse every cliche and plot device and fortunate coincidence, baste with a coat of trendy “steampunk” and then half-bake. Mutant Chronicles was actually pretty fun for the first 45 minutes, as we’re introduced to a future war waged between the four corporations that now control the Earth. Looking a lot like World War I, the sets and art direction are pretty interesting. The camerawork and effects are slick, and the characters and story are tired but watchable. Ron Perlman as a monk with a bad Irish accent was fun for a few minutes, but after the novelty wears off, and the plot and dialogue just keep piling on the dumb, I was ready to get to the ludicrous end as quickly as possible. An extra point for some good effects on a limited budget.